Category Archives: Lists
1. Some how reacquaint myself with Alejandro
2. Get more people to accidentally flirt with
3. Cuddle with everyone
4. Fail an audition
5. Environmental Science class is still not accomplishing anything
6.English Composition II is still not accomplishing anything
7. Be annoyed by my ENG II teacher
8. Talk to Dr. Teacher
9. Send love notes
10. Get rejected
11. Cry pitifully to oneself during class
12. Throw papers manically.
13. Throw oneself onto couch in desparity
14. Devise evil plans
15. Watch stupid videos
16. Facebook too much
17. Listen to depressing music
18. Argue with That Pirate Kid
19. Get Married
20. Disappoint my father
21. Dont drive
22. Drink a lot of tea
23. Microwave a lot of tea and meals
24. Eat alone
25. SHIT TON OF MOISTURIZER
26. LIP BALM
27. Have cold hands
28. Play guitar till my fingers almost bleed and my hand falls asleep.
30. Try to forget
31. Get depressed by the holidays
32. Cancel New Year’s Eve Party because I hate everyone
33. Unfriend a lot of people on facebook like a pro
34. Go shopping.
35. Video game therapy.
36. Block people on Xbox
37. Make new friends
38. Scrap four blog posts.
39. Pretend to do work .
40. Write long lists.
41. Go to Church
42. Send this link to people
So maybe I’m not motivated at all to do things like:
1. finished the last 11 chapters of my Algebra 2 book.
2. Study for the ACT.
3. Be polite to certain individuals.
4. Learn how to control my emotions.
And all these things, I really need to do.
I need to finish my Algebra in order to graduate from high school. I need to study for the ACT in order to get good grades so I can apply to schools that are worth my time.
And another thing.
I’m feeling really useless. I’m feeling like nothing matters. I’m feeling like no matter how much I study, how much I learn, how much money my parents spend on my education, I will never be good enough. Doesn’t matter exactly what I’m “not good enough” for, but that I’ll never get there anyway.
Or maybe, I’m just hitting the cusp of my teen angst and there is no looking back now. Maybe these are my defining moments and I need to make the best of my algebra 2 and ACT while I still have time, or maybe this is just the end for you my friend. (New Found Glory). Sometimes I have a better hold of what I’m trying to say while I’m typing than when it actually is read… Context is all there is in my brain.
Then I heard this song, Selfless by New Found Glory, and they say “I’ll catch up on my sleep when I’m dead.” I really appreciate this. I dont get very much sleep anyways, since I think very well between 9pm and 2 am, but also that I like to get up at 9 and still enjoy a morning cup of tea and feel the morning breeze and listen to the birds. I dont want to miss any second of the day, which means I dont want to be sleeping through the wee hours of the morning/night.
1. Not know how to feel about who you had lunch with.
2. On one hand, they were acting fine, being fine, treating others kindly.
3. But on the other, they are also all those people you can’t seem to form a proper opinion of.
4. Question the definition of “proper”.
5. Environmental Issues was canceled so I made friends with my classmates in our empty time.
6. Reveal more about oneself’s life and hear about others more than you thought you should.
7. Here about That Pirate Kid’s strange summer sex.
8. Try not to look at The Fucking fuck face.
9. Be instructed by Dr. Teacher to contact Teemo.
10. Regret ever telling Dr. Teacher I still had his number.
11. Have bloodshot eyes, all day, errrday.
12. Be concerned about my own two-faced actions,
13. I hate bisexual girls.
14. Why can’t they make up their minds?
15. I need better friends.
16. Crush on someone
17. Become irrevocably disappointed in me.
18. Forget to reschedule counseling.
19. Don’t tell the therapist about You’re In Fucking California X’s return……
20. Try to forget about it.
21. Cry because he doesn’t want to talk about it
22. Wonder why we have to “talk” about these things.
23. Forget exactly why I keep feeling this way.
24. Psychoanalyze self.
25. Remember that I like philosophy better.
26. Philosophize about why I’m like this.
27. Metaphysics sucks.
28. Is it Cause to Effect? Or Effect = Cause? ugh.
29. Listen to really bad indie music.
30. Have band practice.
31. Remember why I love music and laugh hysterically with my mates 🙂
A Teenager’s Guide to Relieving Stress:
#1. Find the closest person to blab too
The more you talk the better it will be right? Get it out of your system? Well after talking to just about every single friend of yours, family members, random strangers, and maybe even the waitress that serves you lunch at your favorite restaurant everyday, you still dont feel any better.
#2. Try talking to a Professional
Hey, it works in most the movies, why not IRL (in real life) ?
#3. Decide you probably need to blow off some steam physically instead.
Run around like a child in park. Jump off a small bridge. Get a adrenaline high by taking a run around the block. Play weird games. Still feel dissatisfied.
#4. Grab a random make out buddy.
You thought this was the best idea yet.
You’re random make-out buddy happens to also have a significant other they forgot to mention. Feel like shit for 2 weeks.
#6. Video game + Monster + Cheetos Binge
You’re young, you’re body can handle it, just not the overwhelming pounds of homework, family drama, and friend catastrophes. When life gets tough, the teenagers get procrastinating.
#7. Decide to make changes about yourself.
Make quirky habits, like always folding your money in your wallet a certain way, or rearranging every salt and pepper shaker you come into contact with in the perfect way on that table.
#8. Pretend like everything’s alright
Everyone else is doing it.
#9. Try something new
Maybe drugs, maybe smoking, maybe a new video game, or maybe a scary combination of Greek yogurt and old crystallized honey bits with graham crackers.
#10. Try to forget you were stressed
Tell yourself many lies. Like : “I am the happiest person on the planet!” , “I love this song!” , “Best week ever!” , “School isn’t so bad.” , “I bet my mom isn’t the only women who will love me.”, “Someday I’ll find my prince.”
#11. Wonder why you started this
Writing stuff on crumpled lined paper titled “Dear diary” isn’t making life easier. Re-watching old ’80’s films is also probably going to give you some type of eye cancer or something bad. Definitely something bad.
#12. Do random Google searches.
This will most definitely make you think about other things. But don’t visit WebM.D., You’ll probably end up being a hypochondriac and then in turn develop extreme germophobia, which will inevitably lead to agoraphobia, says WebM.D. anyways.
#13. Fuck it.
Give up the search and buckle down. Or not.
Here is a totally random blog post for your entertainment, Minecrafter, Fey, and D the Lead Girl
I found this on Cyanide and Happiness’s Face Book page:
Then on that feed I found this:
So, I had heard this before but this confirms my suspicions. Guys have a rule that you just cant pee standing next to someone. And the middle urinal is the urinal only to be used if you are the only one in the bathroom. I’ve heard of “Guy code” and “Bro code” but this is far past that. This is the unbreakable rules of the men’s room. THE MEN’S ROOM as in the only room where they get to be men and dick around. I find it very funny they have this rule because in the lady’s room, most social etiquette get’s tossed out the window. But I guess we don’t exactly share the same space when actually peeing, we have our little boxes we sit in to protect us.
Quotes from this feed: (From all men mind you)
“Who uses the middle urinal??” (1,000 + likes)
“Urinal etiquette goes out the window when there’s a lit candle in the middle urinal.” (40 likes)
“Men who use the middle urinal know, that it is the rule of men to leave one space between urinals, so when you use the center urinal, you’re basically saying fuck you I piss alone, since most bathroom urinals have 3 urinals.”
“An asshole like me who’ll make eye contact with you to make you as uncomfortable as possible.”
This is just a bunch of blah blah from the other day… if you feel inclined to bother.
I always remember the little details of things.
1.What song my friend and I listened to the first time we met in subway when they still sold 5 dollar personal pizza’s. It was You’re Gonna Go Far Kid by The Offspring. He thought that when he said “far” he was saying fuck… haha dumb ass can’t read song titles and recognize chorus’.
2.I remember what outfit I wore when I first made out with a guy. My Tripp.co black and white ripped skinny’s and a black Jackson Pollock t-shirt. I was wearing a red bra, and I also had a sweatshirt that was my brothers. The song’s we played: Perfect Weapon by Black Veil Brides, More Than A Feeling by Boston, and some other awful bullshit.
3.I remember the outfit I was wearing when The worst X broke up with me. Vintage pink cashmere poncho with rabbit fur and white fish nets under a white fluffy skirt.
4. The talk Mr. Teacher gave me about hate.
5. Rosa telling me she felt like we were friends in another life and then never speaking to me again. We must have fought in our other life.
6. Calling Sarah, Rosa because I was thinking about how much they hated each other. She was pissed as fuck.
7. Endless mistakes
8. Clashing teeth with the Fucktard.
I like this:
And that’s all.
This is what happens when I make dumb decisions. I write dumb lists about things that are real so I can reassure myself of…. existence.
1.I am really good at being vague.
2. This ability also makes everyone think really strange things about my weekends.
3. How I spend my weekends varies depending on the season
4. Why the fuck do you care?
5. I really need to stop being so impulsive
7. Uplifting .gifs are nice.
8. I’ve been listening to really sad acoustic music for a long time now…
9. It’s hard to write because that gif is distracting me.
10. I really would like to just play music infinitely.
11. I wrote a song that is really sad but I dont have melody for it that I like.
12. I am trying to get better at arranging songs but it’s not easy.
13. Journalism I am learning is not my strong suit, I am much more of a lit nut.
14. Philosophy is orgasmic to me.
16. Minecrafter of Aphrodite and Fey are so cute…. they are my besties ❤
17. My brother is getting sent home from basic cus he almost died because of an allergic reaction. He will be home tonight.
18. I missed him.
I’ve watched someone bite open a aluminum can with their bare teeth and then chew on it because pain was welcoming.
I’ve watched a mother hit her child.
I’ve watched a boy be molested.
I’ve watched men watch girls and start to sweat.
I’ve watched women size men up and trick them into every evil.
I’ve watched a mother throw away herself into drugs and pleasures.
I’ve watched a man make every bad decision and never learn.
I’ve watched children run from their parents.
I’ve watched the worst kisses.
I’ve watched lies be spoken to every authority.
I’ve watched police officers give up.
I’ve watched teen agers give up.
I’ve watched the pain cross someone face and their eyes glimmer and brim over with tears.
I’ve watched the sun rise and hated the idea of the on coming day.
I’ve watched many horrible things. I hope I never forget them.